0512 – WORLD CHURCH : Holsworth, Jess – A Testimony Of Seeing Jesus Christ (1964)
|
. |
|
|
|
description of work: A testimony by Elder Jess Holsworth of Independence, Missouri delivered to youth of the Springs MO Branch of the Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints on March 27, 1964 tags: Jess Holsworth, Elder Jess Holsworth, Jesus Christ, picture, Nida Vincent King, Independence Missouri, testimony, RLDS Church, Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints |
|
I’m very glad to be here this afternoon, but when our sister called and asked me to come up today, I said “How many will there be?” “Oh,” she said “there will be about a dozen.” Well, I wasn’t expecting a crowd like this being here this afternoon. |
|
What I want to tell you is something that has come to me through fasting and prayer. Now it is my opinion, saints (I suppose that we are all members of the church, the church that we belong to.), it is my opinion that we do not fast and pray enough. I’m not critical but I say this. I don’t think that fasting one meal every two years is enough fasting for this church. That’s just my opinion. But I did something that I don’t know of anyone else in the church doing. I have fasted and prayed for over four years for something that I want to tell you about this afternoon. This is how I fasted. I would fast one meal on Sunday and during the week two and three and maybe sometimes four meals a week. In other words, three and four meals a week I fasted for over four years to have what I’m going to tell you this afternoon. |
|
I have had many wonderful experiences, spiritual experiences in the church, but what I’m going to tell you now I think it is the greatest experience that anyone could have, that of seeing and talking with our Savior. I have always believed there was a Savior. You believe there was a Savior. I’ve always believed it but I didn’t know it. I couldn’t swear that there was because belief is faith and seeing is knowledge. That’s the difference between faith and knowledge. Now I know there is a crowd of young people here this afternoon. That’s knowledge. That’s the difference between belief and knowledge. I’ve always believed there was a Savior but I didn’t know it. But this is what I did. |
|
I was at home one afternoon and the room was just about this light in the afternoon. I was by myself. My wife had gone to church for a women’s meeting, or something that I forget just what, but I was sitting in our front room. Our front room is about twelve feet wide and about twenty-four feet long. Our living room is. And I was sitting in an armchair, a rocking chair like this, by the side of the door. I got down on my knees and prayed with both of my arms on the side of the chair and I prayed that I might have – if it be the Lord’s will – that I might have that knowledge that he was the Christ, the Son of God. I’ve always had that desire in my heart and in my mind to have that knowledge. The Lord has said, to some it is given to know that he is the Christ and to some it is given to believe on their testimony. I know there is a Savior for I have seen him. |
|
As I was on my knees praying, this thought came into my mind. “Well, I don’t think I’ll pray anymore.” There was a spirit of doubt. If you ever have a spiritual experience, not only myself but others have said, the spirit of doubt always comes just ahead of a spiritual experience. That’s been my experience and that of many others. That thought came into my mind “Well, I don’t think I’ll pray anymore. Lord, I think four years is long enough to pray for that knowledge that you are the Christ.” And when that thought came into my mind I glanced into the far corner right up next to the ceiling. In the far right corner I saw a bright light. |
|
The light was almost two feet in diameter; just as bright as the noonday sun but it didn’t dazzle my eyes. It never hurt my eyes. I looked at that light. I could see that it was an answer to my prayers. I began to pray to that light, and when I began to pray, a face appeared in that light. Then I looked at that face and I began to pray to that face for worthiness. I wanted to be humble. I asked the Lord, that if I had done anything wrong, to forgive me. I wanted to stand before him, acceptable, that I might be worthy to receive anything that he had, in his wisdom, to show me. As I continued to pray, I could see the light and the face come down closer to the floor. And when it was ten or twelve feet from me, I could see down to his waist and I could tell by his position that he was walking on the floor. He kept walking up toward me. The closer he came the more light exposed his body. |
|
When he came up right in front of me, right up to where I was, I could see the light shining about halfway between his knees and his feet. I didn’t see his feet. What he had on his feet I don’t know for I didn’t see his feet. The light that was around him was almost two feet all the way around him down below his knees. He had on one of the most beautiful white robes that I ever saw. As I looked at the garment he had on, his sleeves were up a little past his wrists. I looked at his sleeves. I looked at his garment in front of him. There wasn’t a seam in the garment. I thought to myself, “How in the world could a garment be made without a seam in it?” I just read in the scriptures, just a day or two ago, that when Christ was crucified the garment that he had on didn’t have a seam in it. That’s in the scripture. |
|
As I looked at him, he extended his hand to me. I put one of my hands under his and I put the other one on top. I didn’t squeeze his hand; I pressed his hand just like that [as demonstrated]. As I slid my hand off of his, right there in the palm of his hand was a hole. I was so weak when I looked at his hand, if I hadn’t been on my knees on the floor, I would have fallen to the floor. I was just that weak. I released his hand and I raised my hands and I said, “Glory be to God in the highest. Now I know Jesus lives, for I have seen him!” And he extended his hand to me and he said, “When you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” I’ll tell you pretty soon what he meant when he said that. He extended his hand to me the second time and I did the very same thing. I put one of my hands under his and the other one on top and I gently pressed his hand. As I slid my hands over his, there was the print of the nail in the palm of his hand. I released his hand again, and I raised my hand and I said again, “Glory be to God in the highest, now I know that Jesus lives for I have seen him!” He put out his hand like that [demonstrated] and he said, “You bear this testimony to this unbelieving, dying world – that I live, today.” Saints, what a wonderful testimony that is to bear – that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God. And I’ll tell you in a minute what he meant when he said those words. |
|
I looked at him from his head to as far down as I could see. I looked at him and I judged him to be between 30 and 35 years of age. The scripture tells us that when he died he was about 33 or 34 years of age. He looked to be about that old. And I judged him to be about five foot six or five foot seven [inches] tall. And I judged him to weigh about a hundred and thirty-five pounds. He wasn’t heavy. He may have been two or three pounds more than that. But in my own mind I judged him to weigh about a hundred and thirty-five pounds. And the man who is near his size and build, some of you know him [and] some of you don’t, Brother C. Ed Miller. He’s one of the finest men. He’s gone to his reward now. But he was one of the finest men that I knew in the church. He was just about or near Brother Miller’s size. |
|
I looked at him and he smiled at me. Saints, I will never forget the smile upon his face. I thought then, and I think so right now, that when my time of departure shall come (and we’re all going to leave this life one of these days. Yes, we will.), that when my time of departure shall come and I have to stand before him, if I can receive that same welcoming smile when I stand before him as I did when he appeared to me in my home, I will feel like my life has been well spent here. |
|
There are three things that you who have pictures of him in your homes… there are three things that you have of him that he doesn’t have. One of them is, he doesn’t have his hair parted in the middle. No he does not. Another is, he does not have long hair hanging down over his shoulders. No he does not. Some of you have seen a picture of him with a Van Dyke beard; chin whiskers. He does not have chin whiskers, but he had a beard on his face. The beard on his chin was no longer than the beard on his face. He had a rabbi beard. I have met and been introduced to and talked to Jewish rabbis in Kansas City and those who have beards have bushy beards. That’s the kind that our Savior has, a bushy beard. |
|
After I had talked to him, he turned to the right and I could get a side view of him. I believe he did it on purpose so I could see how long his hair was, because I saw the side of his face and his hair was combed straight back. It wasn’t parted. It was combed straight back. He had a high forehead and it was combed straight back and the hair lacked about an inch and one half of touching his garment. It didn’t touch his garment. No it did not. |
|
I glanced away from him for just a second and I looked back again and he was gone. Now how he disappeared, I don’t know. He disappeared just like he appeared. |
|
Now I want to tell you what he meant when he said “When you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” Many of you have read our church history [about] when Joseph Smith went out in the woods to pray. In our church history there is only a very brief account of that experience…but the sister who painted this picture [displayed], her mother has a book of Joseph Smith’s own personal experiences. In that he gave a minute description of what transpired that day, out in the woods, when he went out in the woods to pray. And, by the way, I have stood right where God and Christ appeared before him. I have been in that grove, myself, in New York. He says this. He said there were two personages who appeared before him. One was a little bit higher up than where he was, and the one who was below, on the same elevation that I was, was a younger man. But the one above, a few feet above, was an older man. But he said that the younger man looked just like the older man. You’ve heard it said (probably if I would see some of you boys’ fathers) that you look like your father. That’s what he meant when he said “When you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” He looks like God, himself. That’s what he looks like. |
|
This past winter I cut an article out of the Kansas City Star. A man wrote an article in the Kansas City Star (Oh, it was about a foot long.) and he was telling about the condition of the world today. I’m not speaking of the church I’m speaking of the world – the condition of the world. He says this in his article. He says “We are living, today, in a spiritually dying world.” The world is dying spiritually. Christ said “…unbelieving, dying world.” It means the same thing, only worded differently, when the Lord said to “…bear this testimony to this unbelieving, dying world.” You know there are so many people who don’t believe in our Savior. That’s true, but I can’t help that. |
|
I have told you my testimony but I want to give you the testimony of others to verify some of the things that I have said. Some of you remember Brother J.F. Curtis. He used to be one of the Twelve [apostles]. I have known Brother Curtis for over fifty years. He’s a patriarch now and lives in Seattle [Spokane WA] or someplace in Oregon or Washington. He’s in very poor health. He was here for conference and I told Brother Curtis, I said “Brother Curtis, I have seen the Savior.” He said “Describe him to me.” I described him just like I described him to you and when I had finished describing him, he said “Brother Holsworth, I have seen the Savior, myself, and I have talked to him face-to-face and I can’t give you a better description of our Savior than what you have just given me.” That’s one testimony. |
|
A brother came to my home, here, two or three months ago – he was sitting here, his wife was there, and I was here and we were talking. I have a picture that is about 16×20 [inches]. It’s hanging in the right front corner of the room. He turned and he looked at that picture and he stood there. I saw him reach into his pocket and take out his handkerchief and begin to wipe his eyes. I said “Brother, what are you crying about?” This was about two or three months ago. He said “Brother Holsworth, I was at the point of death in the hospital. The doctors and nurses all gave me up. I couldn’t live. He said “A personage came to the side of my bed and said “I am watching over you while you are here.” He said “That picture looks just like the one who came and stood by the side of the bed and told me that “I am watching over you while you are here.” |
|
This last winter at Christmastime, or before that, sometime ago I was asked by a sister to come and talk to the young people. They were twelve to sixteen years of age and wanted me to tell about seeing the Savior. The teachers had all of them come up close in front and sit in the front rows of the church. But there were two girls, just about as large as this girl over here. There were two girls who sat clear in the back end of the church and the rest of them were all up here in front. The teacher tried to get them to come up and sit with the rest but they shook their heads. I looked back there and thought “Well, why don’t you girls come up with the rest of them?” But I didn’t say anything. |
|
After I had finished telling about seeing the Savior, one of the teachers went back and they were both crying and the teacher asked them “What are you girls crying about?” Each one talked to the other. One of them said to the other “You tell him.” “No,” the other girl said “you tell him.” Well, they both told me and this is what they both told me and the teacher. They told the teacher why they were crying and after they told the teacher she said “You come up and talk to Brother Holsworth.” Well they came up and the tears were rolling down those girls’ cheeks and they were crying like their hearts would break and I thought to myself, “Well, what in the world did I say that would hurt their feelings and cause them to cry?” I looked at them when they stood right before me and I said “What do you girls want to talk to me about?” And they talked to each other. One of them said to the other “You tell him.” “No,” the other one said “you tell him.” Well they both told me and this is what they both told me. They said “While you were telling about seeing the Savior, we saw a crown of gold resting on your head which was a testimony to us that what you were saying was the truth. And they stood there and cried just like their hearts would break. They were young in years, saints. They had a future before them. They will have their trials just like we do (We have our trials.). Trials will come to them but they will remember, when trials come to them, they will remember the experience that I told about that will cause them to hold fast to the rod of iron. But one thing I forgot to do. I forgot to get their names. It just slipped my mind. I didn’t do it. I don’t know why but I just forgot to ask who they were. |
|
This last winter around Christmastime, a sister from the Southside Church called me and said she wanted one of the pictures that are 8×10 [inches]. I told her that I had some there if she called for them and she brought her daughter along with her. As we stood around the dining room table talking, the sister said “Brother Holsworth, I want to tell you something.” She said, “You remember sometime ago you were over at the Southside Church telling about seeing the Savior and there were two girls that sat clear in the rear of the church and wouldn’t come up front with the rest of them?” “Yes,” I said “I remember that and I’ve always wondered why they didn’t.” She pointed to her daughter. She said “My daughter was one of those two girls.” |
|
I looked at her and she began to cry. She said “That’s true Brother Holsworth. I was one of those girls who were sitting back in the rear of the church and I saw that crown of gold on your head. It was a testimony to me that what you said was the truth.” |
|
Brother Arthur Oakman (Many of you know him. He’s one of the Twelve.) said “I have never seen the Savior but I have always pictured in my mind what he looked like. But I’ve never seen him. He said “I have been all over England, all over Germany, France, Holland, Belgium, all over the United States and Canada in my ministry, where I have been sent in the interest of the church, and wherever I have gone I have always tried to find a picture that looked like our Savior.” “I never could find one” he said “that I thought looked like him. I came home and I found a picture that I thought looked like him in my own neighborhood.” He said, “That picture should be in every Latter Day Saint home.” What he did do, he gave the sister who painted this picture (I’ll tell you in a minute how this picture was painted.) the addresses of some German saints who lived in East Berlin in East Germany and she sent them that picture. Right now, saints, that picture of the Savior is behind the iron curtain. It is. |
|
This is how the picture was painted. I was telling this experience to a good Latter Day Saint woman [Nida Vincent King]. She said “Describe him to me and I’ll paint his picture.” I said “Can you do that?” “Yes,” she said “I’m an artist.” She said “That’s my trade; my profession.” I described him just like I have described him to you here this afternoon and she painted the picture. After she had painted the picture she sent for me and I went to her home. I said “Sister, that looks just like him when I saw him.” I said “How in the world could you paint his picture just be me telling you?” To me, saints, that’s an impossibility for anybody to paint your picture just by somebody telling of you and describing you. She said “I could not have done it, only my mind was inspired.” “And while I was painting the picture” she said “something seemed to be pushing my hand all the time.” That is how the picture was painted. |
|
This last winter I was called to go over to the Veteran’s Hospital here in Kansas City to see a man who was in the service. He was injured in the war and this is what this man told me. He said “I belong to the Baptist Church. I live nine miles north of Springfield, Missouri. I fought the Japanese in the last war and I was a paratrooper. There were twenty-one of us who were dropped behind the enemy line. We were given enough ammunition and enough rations to last three days. We were told that when we used that up, we would be sent more ammunition and more rations.” But he said “They never did send anymore rations, and never sent anymore ammunition.” “For six days I was laying” he said “by the side of a coconut log.” The coconut trees are not any too big and he was about as big as a coconut log would be. “Out of the twenty-one, there were eighteen of the boys killed” he said. “There were three of us spared. The other two were wounded” he said. “One of the boys got his nose shot off. The other boy got his ear shot off.” |
|
He said “Brother, believe me I was scared! If I had moved my feet, they would have shot my feet off. If I had moved my head they would have pierced it with bullets. I lay there and I thought ‘Well this is it. I’ll never survive this.’” This is this soldier’s testimony. He said, “When that went through my mind, a cloud descended right in front of me and in that cloud was a personage. When the cloud cleared away and the personage stood before me, he extended his hands and said “You will not be shot or injured here.” He said “I told my buddies who were laying there wounded, ‘Let’s run. Jump and run.’” “Oh,” they said “don’t get up. You’ll be killed.” “No,” he said “the Lord is here and he is going to protect us.” And he said “We were laying here, the enemy was over on this side, and on this side was a cliff about thirty-five feet to the bottom.” He said “The three of us jumped and jumped over that cliff. I landed on my back and injured my back. That’s why I am in the hospital.” |
|
He said “The Baptist people tell us that when Christ was crucified, they drove the nail in his wrist so that it wouldn’t tear out.” “But” he said “such was not the case.” He said “When he [Jesus] extended his hand, I saw the print of the nail in the palm of each hand.” “So” he said “the print of the nail is in his hand and not in his wrist.” |
|
Brother Allen’s boy had one of these pictures and he showed him the picture. His face lit up and he said “That looks just like the one who stood before me on the battlefield and told me that I wouldn’t be killed here.” I thought that was a wonderful testimony from an outsider. So that tells me, saints, that God is no respecter of persons. This man said “The Lord appeared to you at one place and he appeared to me on the battlefield.” So the Lord knows our emergencies and that’s when he comes to us when he realizes our needs. That man needed protection and I needed for the Lord to hear and answer my prayer. So, saints, that is my testimony of seeing and talking with the Savior. |
|
The sister who painted this picture, the picture she painted is over two feet wide and about three feet tall. She took it to a photographer in the City and she made some pictures of it. I said “How much are you going to charge for those pictures.” She said “Brother Holsworth, I can’t afford to have them made and give them away.” I said “I’m not asking you to do that.” “But” I said “whatever that costs you, that’s what you could charge for those pictures.” She said “For that 8×10 picture I have to pay a dollar for every one.” And so I said “Then it’s alright for you to charge a dollar.” But what she did do, she had a picture that was 16×20 (I had one in my home in the front room.) and she charges $15.00 for that picture because it’s tinted. It’s a beautiful picture. It’s about 16×20 [inches]. What she also did, she had some small ones made – they’re pocket-sized; billfold-sized. They are 2 ¼ by 3 ¼ [inches] that fit your billfold. |
